Up in Smoke

[January 23rd, 2008]

Four hours removed from my visit to The Standard (14 NE 22nd Ave., 233-4181), all I can smell is smoke. There are fans hanging from the expansive eastside bar’s high wooden ceilings, but no one bothers to turn them on—and no one seems to mind (sheesh, it’s just cancer!). Once inside the cloud, though, one can’t help but notice the sheer genius of the place: It’s a virtual museum of working-class beer, with glorious old memorabilia from Hamm’s, Rainier and the fabled Schlitz brand (the Standard was opened by an ex-Club 21-er, Reed Lamb, after all). Not one but three pinball machines, shuffleboard and a sweet jukebox round out the entertainment. Scooting a chair out on the concrete floors sounds like fingernails on a chalkboard, but maybe you need that kind of noise just to fill up the space. The well-decorated off-Burnside spot certainly does feel like home—or Grandpa’s pimp-ass garage, at the very least. It’s highly recommended that you arrive early to grab a sweet booth, load up on potato boats and pump the juke full of Bowie and Queen (and Superchunk!). After the looming smoking ban takes effect, the Standard will likely become one of East Burnside’s craziest spots, especially considering its huge street-side patio. You know, I might even miss the smoke.