BOYS WILL BE SISSYBOYS

[July 20th, 2005] Sissyboy scares me.

Less than a year ago, this queer drag collective was started by "Zebra," a 27-year-old Whole Foods operative looking to get laid. And although it still has yet to embark into its terrible twos, these freakoids have already infected the agit-pop entertainment scene with shows like the "Zombie Pin-Up Pageant" and stunts that include oatmeal wrestling and props like geriatric walkers. It's hard to go anywhere without someone asking me about a "Sissyboy."

Zebra, whose real name is Mark Thomas, agreed to tell me more about this notorious group over tea and cakes. He was joined by one of the core queers who make up the 10-member troupe, the much-younger-than-he-looks Devan McGrath, 21. While both of them were reluctant to bash the dyke scene, specifically their female-to-male drag-king counterparts, they did let me know that "Sissyboy is a reaction to feminist [as well as] Portland culture-which is so PC," said Zebra. "[People told us] we couldn't do it. But we do it intelligently, in a fun way-and we look really hot doing it."

"The dyke scene is so unified," said McGrath about the "dyke mafia" he thinks has locked up all the best queer nights, DJs and killer house parties. "There was no alternative queer community for boys."

Now, a lot of punk boys love to dress up as girls. It's what the kids are doing nowadays. But Sissyboy has torched its own particular, take-no-prisoners trail since its very first show at I.C. Mummy (Sissyboy has since taken its show on the road to Holocene, and for its upcoming anniversary extravaganza it will invade the massive new Wonder Ballroom). Perhaps that's because, while most female impersonators strive to be gender illusionists, these club kids with a conscience are more likely to be considered gender disillusionists.

The Sissyboys themselves prefer the term "gender terrorists." That may sound harsh, but those two words fit this mash-up of misfits better than a mesh-knitted tube top.

"We like to say Sissyboy is a punk-rock, backhand slap-in-the-face reaction to the ever-prevalent need to bend gender roles until they break," reads Zebra from the group's original mission statement.

Unafraid to tackle taboo subject matter-they've been called "anti-everything"-and unwilling to hide the fact that they're men, Sissyboy is a cross between a theatrical experience and an ahead-of-its-time cultural experiment. It's as if San Francisco's Cockettes met the BBC's bawdy and much ballyhooed sketch comedy troupe Little Britain underneath the Burnside Bridge. You don't know whether to crack up or just think they're all on crack. And you might think they have to be on drugs for the pay: a whopping $25 per month.

But I don't think these Sissyboys are in it for the money. I believe these "artists" would rather starve than compromise their idiosyncratic act. And their next show, Sissyboy Is Offensive and Wrong!, a courtroom-inspired year in review, is sure to scare or at least confuse a few folks-including me. The gender terrorists have already won.