Who's Dodging Bullets, And Who's Catching Them.

[May 10th, 2006] WINNERS

With gas prices topping $3 a gallon at many Portland stations, oil is becoming a four-letter word. So please give props to greenies enjoying their karmic revenge while zipping by in cars powered by biodiesel , which last week was cheaper than many pumps' petro-diesel.

Multnomah Athletic Club members with criminal pasts can rest easy, safe in the knowledge that Andrew Wiederhorn can't "out" them. Wiederhorn had threatened, as part of his lawsuit seeking re-admittance to the MAC, to scour the club's files for members with criminal records like himself. But a judge last week dismissed that lawsuit.

The latest "class" lesson in Portland Public Schools tells us that elementary schools with well-heeled kids got to dodge the latest round of closures. Northeast's Hollyrood Elementary and Southwest's Rieke Elementary remain alive for the moment after votes last week by the Portland School Board.

Gresham will get some overdue love this summer from the Oregon Department of Transportation. ODOT promises to highlight the burb in upcoming sign makeovers along Interstate 84, so no one need ever worry about missing the exit for 207th Avenue again.

LOSERS

At least Gov. Ted Kulongoski can say he tops President Bush's rock-bottom poll ratings. But that's slim comfort, given that a poll released last week by The Oregonian and KATU showed a measly 43 percent of Dems want four more years of the increasingly vulnerable guv.

Sunday's Oregonian exposed Army recruiters who signed up an 18-year-old autistic Marshall High School senior. Their alleged refusal to even look at the medical records his mother offered guarantees them a bunk in a special circle of Hell below even payday lenders.

Future high-school students will no longer be able to buy Cokes and other sweet fizzy drinks in the hallway. The litigation-leery soda industry announced last week they're pulling sugary beverages out of schools within four years. No word yet how caffeine-starved teens plan on staying awake through English class.