August 27th, 2008
“Son of a bitch, you’re running up the meter!”27 comments
August 20th, 2008
"Hey bro, remember me? You wrote that story about me in the paper."3 comments
August 13th, 2008
“It’s the Californians, man, the Californians are the worst.”15 comments
August 6th, 2008
The middle-aged man I picked up at Vendetta is in a hyperactively verbose lather ...0 comments
July 23rd, 2008
When I step into the obese old woman's apartment5 comments
July 16th, 2008
The obese old woman at Fred Meyer has a bad hip and a wheelchair...8 comments
July 9th, 2008
“...I need to take a shower first and wash all of this blood off.”6 comments
July 2nd, 2008
“So I’ve got these two women in the back of my cab who just refuse to get out...”8 comments
June 25th, 2008
“My friend’s getting divorced, and he’s really drunk,” says the bartender...8 comments
June 18th, 2008
There’s nothing like a good Friday night, and I’m referring to the money.3 comments
[May 31st, 2006] [CONTINUED FROM LAST WEEK]
I can't believe it. This lady just yanked my key right out of the ignition and bolted.
I grab her bag off the floor: "Oh no, you're not running on me." She's yelling, "I'm a bail bondsman, you don't know who you're fucking with." Uh, sure. I tell dispatch to send cops.
The woman leans back in, her mad eyes gleaming with a sort of demented glee. When I try to grab my cab key away from her she grabs my wrist: "Now I have you for physical assault, you are going down." "And you are totally insane," I reply. "Get the fuck out of my face, you're not getting this stuff back from me."
The cops arrive. I hear her start in about how I was running her all over the place, refusing to take directions, subjecting her to verbal and physical assault.
Any concerns I have as to who the cops will believe are erased by one arched eyebrow on the part of the one interviewing me, as she overhears the woman raging about how "she made me late for my wedding, too!" "Really, you're getting married at midnight on a Saturday?" asks the other officer, rather mildly, all things considered.
I lack the column space to adequately convey the level of crazy that came out of this woman's mouth. It'll suffice to say that even when she was standing there in cuffs, she was still telling me I was under citizen's arrest. Needless to say, I didn't get paid.
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RECENT COMMENTS ON “I can't believe it. [CONTINUED FROM LAST WEEK]”
I can't believe it. [CONTINUED FROM LAST WEEK]Cabbie how do you do it?I read your column and wonder if this was my life why would I not just put the gun to my head. Seriously...—gl
more!I lack the column space to adequately convey the level of crazy that came out of this woman's mouth.Give Night Cabbie more column space. It's the best stuff in the paper.—...
I can't believe it. [CONTINUED FROM LAST WEEK]"gl" - It's called 'dealing with the public on a regular basis'. Anyone who has to deal with the everyday psychos called humanity has stories like ...









