Toys, Gadgets & Gizmos

[November 22nd, 2006]

Pay No Attention to the Man Behind the Desk

Keep gullible coworkers in awe with the IFO 3000 Globe ($99, northwestnatureshop.com), a desk-lamp-sized stand that uses magnetic fields to levitate a 6-inch globe. Credulous minds will snap at the very sight of the thing, and the somewhat less susceptible will bow before you, honoring your achievement. Better yet, the globe can be switched out for other floating objects, from model airplanes to glowing orbs.

Get Primal

Mark Beyer's "neo-primitive" style has been influencing contemporary art, comic and otherwise, for 20 years now. From his long-running weekly comic strip Amy and Jordan, by way of Dark Horse Comics, come Amy and Jordan bendies ($29.99, Things from Another World, 4133 NE Sandy Blvd., 284-4693; CounterMedia, 927 SW Oak St., 226-8141), soft, pliable, third-dimension translations of Beyer's art. Like Gumby, only cuter and creepier, the set is great for kids of all ages. Well, weird-ass kids.

Christmas Past/Christmas Future

For traditional simplicity, check out the children's toys at Canoe (1136 SW Alder St., 889-8545), from the balsa-wood Jetstream Glider ($3) that kids have been flying for 50 years to the Balancing Cactus ($20), a kind of hipster version of Jenga that challenges players to build up a rubber-wood "cactus" without making the whole thing tumble. This must be what the right-wingers keep going on about.

Ho-Ho-H2O

Some people are weird about weather; if they don't know the projected temperature within one-tenth of a degree, they lose it. Well, the Complete Regional Weather Station ($150, The Sharper Image, Pioneer Place, 700 SW 5th Ave., 228-3610, sharperimage.com), from wonderful Tualatin-based company Oregon Scientific, will keep your wannabe meteorologist happy as a clam with temperature, humidity, UV index, rainfall history and an extended forecast—all updated every two minutes by FM radio signals.

It's A Guy Thing

Meredith Dittmar has been hawking her line of original polymer-clay statuettes for 12 years now, and her creativity hasn't flagged a bit. My Guys ($10-$15, Greg's, 3707 SE Hawthorne Blvd., 235-1257) are 2 to 3 inches tall and range from the innocent to the devilish, but are all infectiously cute. The sort of cute that makes you feel compelled to hoard and display in glass cabinets, muttering sweet nothings to when no one else is around. That cute.

Yummy in the Tummy

Give your laptop a little love with an adorable notebook sleeve from Barry's Farm. The Monster Laptop Sleeve ($65, barrysfarm.com) is about the cutest thing ever made, anywhere. The padded felt helps ward off bumps and scratches, all the while giving the impression that your computer has been eaten by a hungry Muppet. Available sizes fit 12- to 17-inch laptops, though they like little ones better—they have less trans fat.

Ukioy-e (a.k.a. The Floating World)

Get a new perspective on life with Holga's Fisheye2 camera ($70, Ivy Studio, 800 E Burnside St., 231-7400), a compact 35-mm camera with an enormous wide-angle lens, perfect for drawing attention to what's right in front of you. The Fisheye2 can also easily shoot multiple exposures and long nighttime exposures, allowing you to get awesome effects without having to rewind the film by hand. Bet your digital can't do that!

Does it Have to Have a Point?

From Japanese company Sega Toys comes the weirdest pet substitute to hit our shores since Sony's Aibo was discontinued. The iFish ($64, Just Be Complex, 107 NW 5th Ave., 796-2733) moves its translucent body "like a real fish" and makes eerie "deep-sea sounds" while lights in its head flash rhythmically. Hook it up to your iPod or stereo system and the iFish turns into a loudspeaker while dancing and flashing to the music. Why? Because it's awesome.

Ding-Zap-D'oh!

Trust us: Nothing says "I love you" like pinball. Run down to Specialty Coin Products and pick up one of their brand-new pinball tables. We like The Simpsons Pinball Party ($4,195, 2108 SE Ochoco St., 786-9200), a nice, licensed number with more than the requisite number of bells, whistles and Lisa-themed bumpers. Don't like The Simpsons? Other new tables include the omnipresent NASCAR and a Trump-worthy "Monopoly" theme.

Like Hell it's Christmas

He's big and red and travels the world separating the naughty from the nice. Santa? No, Dark Horse comics character Hellboy! There's a whole pile of hella cute Hellboy merchandise to be had at Things From Another World (4133 NE Sandy Blvd, 284-4693, and other locations), from the tentacled Hellboy Christmas Ornament ($15.96) to the elegant Deluxe Hellboy Talking Board ($79.99). The latter comes in a hardwood box with everything you need to channel ghosts, Victorian-style. Have a hellish holiday!

^GIMME MORE

Parisian Play-Toy French poodles take too much work. French toy poodles take no work, are handpainted and never toot. Miss Toby is a prime example ($59, Hello, Portland, 525 NW 23rd Ave., 274-0771) of the toy poodle's superiority.

Underage Polka Out-Polish your niece or nephew with the Schylling Red Wooden Accordion ($20, Finnegan's Toys & Gifts. 922 SW Yamhill St., 221-0306). Train them early to become the next Oom-pah Loompas.

Gorillaz in our midst The Gorillaz are in the Guinness Book of World Records as the most successful virtual band ever. The Missing Link (3314 SE Belmont St., 235-0032) sells toy replicas ($22) of the cartoon band members.