September 3rd, 2008
Elephants Suffer, On All Fronts.1 comment
August 27th, 2008
Taking Your Share and Then Some1 comment
August 20th, 2008
Teenage Drinkers, Bikini Coffee and Cuban Showgirls0 comments
August 13th, 2008
Trucker Bombs: Still Preferable to Russian Bombs.0 comments
August 6th, 2008
Successful people doing stupid things.2 comments
July 30th, 2008
Hey, GQ: your mama’s so big….0 comments
July 23rd, 2008
Nazis, terrorists and gamblers join the listening circle.1 comment
July 16th, 2008
Signs of the Apocalypse9 comments
July 9th, 2008
Small consolation edition.2 comments
July 2nd, 2008
Escapees and exiles edition.0 comments
 Bill O’Reilly |
[November 7th, 2007]
WINNERS
1 Robert Pamplin Jr. finally managed not to look like a cranky old rich guy when he buried the hatchet with City Hall and finally donated part of Ross Island to the city. Other winners? City commissioners. Pamplin handed each of them a genuine Ross Island rock, giving the largest stones to Mayor Tom Potter and other “relevant” pols.
2 Fox News demagogue Bill O’Reilly won some extra lebensraum when MSNBC, home of O’Reilly arch-rival Keith Olbermann, got bumped locally from Comcast’s basic analog cable service. Portland libs blasted the change but got no satisfaction from the cable guys. Apparently, the revolution was televised—you just missed it.
3 The fear factor has fallen for local bank tellers now that the FBI has arrested Robert Christie. The feds believe the 71-year-old retiree from Tillamook may be the “Waddling Bandit” responsible for a two-year string of bank robberies in western Oregon and Washington. Don’t rest too easy: Christie’s son says the cops got the wrong man.
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LOSERS[/b]
1 A plea to City Commissioner [b]Randy Leonard : Please leave the undercover stunts to WW interns. In furtherance of his latest crusade—this one keeping the world safe from spray paint—Leonard bravely went undercover last week at a Home Depot to discover the many ways the store was breaking his new anti-graffiti ordinance. Hey, Serpico, is City Hall really that slow?
2 Good thing so many marginally employed trustafarians love Portland—because the city is no paradise for people who must work for a living. That sucking sound you hear from Swan Island is more family-wage jobs leaving town after Freightliner announced it was outsourcing 341 positions to South Carolina.
3 Decemberist fans wiped away tears after the Portland bards announced—in a cryptic online message—that they’re canceling the Portland and Seattle legs of their “The Long and Short of It” tour. We haven’t felt so disappointed since their new album came out, but it’s good to know major labels allow sick time.
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