Beau Coup

[April 1st, 2009]

Beau Breedlove was a special guest last week at Voodoo Doughnut for Cockfest ’09—as a judge for how many doughnuts contestants could balance on their dicks.

That March 26 event came just two days after men’s porn mag Unzipped released its cover photo of Breedlove for the issue hitting newsstands April 7 (see more about both Cockfest and the Unzipped cover here and here).

Hard to believe it took Breedlove little more than two months after Mayor Sam Adams admitted Jan. 19 he had lied about his affair with Breedlove for Breedlove to cross over into the realm of “Is there nothing this guy won’t do?”

Is it really that hard to believe, though? Compare Breedlove’s “15 minutes of fame” journey with those who have walked before him through Scandal Land.

Monica Lewinsky

Well known for: The same thing as Breedlove, but on a much, much larger scale. After graduating from Lewis Clark College in 1995, Lewinsky accepted a position as an unpaid intern in the White House and began a two-year affair with President Clinton.

Her 15 minutes of fame highlights: On Jan. 17, 1998, the Drudge Report broke the story that she’d had an affair with the president. In March 1998, she appeared before a federal grand jury to describe her relationship with Clinton. In late 1998, Lewinsky published an autobiography and self-help book, Monica Speaks. In May 1999, she lampooned herself on Saturday Night Live.

Her 15 minutes of fame were up when: She hosted a Fox reality-TV matchmaking show, Mr. Personality, in spring 2003. It lasted five episodes.

Last in the spotlight: In May 2006, she graduated with a master’s degree in social psychology from the London School of Economics.

Tonya Harding

Well known for: Pleading guilty in 1994 to conspiracy to hinder prosecution in the assault of rival figure skater Nancy Kerrigan.

Her 15 minutes of fame highlights: She placed eighth in the 1994 Winter Olympics after it was revealed she and ex-husband Jeff Gillooly were under investigation for the Kerrigan attack. She pleaded guilty March 16, 1994, to hindering prosecution after Gillooly and “bodyguard” Shawn Eckhardt both confessed and implicated her in the Kerrigan attack. She was sentenced to three years’ probation and ordered to pay $160,000 in fines. In fall 1994, in an early example of the Internet sex-tape phenomenon, Gillooly released a video of himself and Harding in the act. Stills later made their way to Penthouse. From 1995 through 2002, Harding had eight run-ins with the police.

Her 15 minutes of fame were up when: In 2002, she appeared on Fox’s Celebrity Boxing and won a fight with Clinton accuser Paula Jones. Harding eventually went into women’s pro boxing and retired in 2003 with a 3-3 record.

Last in the spotlight: In 2008 she joined the cast of TruTV’s The Smoking Gun Presents: World’s Dumbest as a commentator.

Brian Gerard “Kato” Kaelin

Well known for: Being a guest at O.J. Simpson’s house when Nicole Brown Simpson and Ron Goldman were killed on June 12, 1994.

His 15 minutes of fame highlights: Kaelin gave four days of rambling and incoherent testimony at Simpson’s 1995 trial (prosecutor Marcia Clark declared him a hostile witness; the rest of America labeled him an idiot). In January 1996, Kaelin posed bare-chested for the cover of Playgirl. In 1998, he landed a movie role in BASEketball and began a national college-circuit speaking tour called “The Sixteenth Minute,” discussing his brush with fame.

His 15 minutes of fame were up when: In 2005, he appeared in three National Lampoon strip poker pay-per-view events. Losers were forced to dive into the “pool of shame,” then be interviewed in “Kato’s Guesthouse.”Last in the spotlight:In 2008, he joined the short-lived Fox reality-show competition Gimme My Reality Show! He lost.