So you're wealthy and worried that Y2K mania will rile the
masses into a millennial frenzy of Bolshevik proportions?
Forget for a moment that Jan. 1 may provoke widespread eruptions
of insanity and ecstasy, the wipeout of your blue-chip stocks
and the rebirth of the barter economy. Just look at New Year's
Eve like everyone always has--as an excuse to party. To prepare
you and your bank account for the coming craziness, here's
an advance look at some of the swankest shindigs around town.
MCMENAMINS EDGEFIELD
O, the irony! This former poor
farm is hosting some of the priciest entertainment in the
area, so you'll have to drop many Benjamins for the honor
of slumbering where impoverished farmers once laid their
weary, overworked heads. The big ticket is the Poor Farm
Package ($1,000 per couple), which provides a room for the
nights of Dec. 31 and Jan. 1, an exclusive gourmet
dinner, access to shows by Linda Hornbuckle and the Woody
Hite Big Band, complimentary bottles of Edgefield champagne
with commemorative flutes, keepsake bathrobes, breakfast
and more. The Black Rabbit Package ($750 per couple) offers
similar amenities--except dinner's in the Black Rabbit restaurant
and the Woody Hite gig's a no-no--while at night's end,
the Little Red Shed Package ($500 per couple) shuttles you
to off-property hotel rooms at the Best Western or Troutdale
Inn of America. For menus and more specific information
on this and other McMenamins events, log on to www.mcmenamins.com/y2k.
(JG)
McMenamins-Edgefield, 2126 SW Halsey St., Troutdale,
669-8610.
5 pm. $500-$1,000 per couple.
SWINGIN' IN THE MILLENNIUM
If you want to hang with
the highest of high society, it's gonna cost you--you'll
have to dig out 67,500 pennies from under the sofa cushions
just to get in Atwater's door. Once there, you'll get a
grand view of the buglike, scurrying rabble below from your
golden perch on the 30th floor, where a four-course meal
(starting at 6:30 pm) will be accompanied by the sweet strains
of the Atwater's Trio. Meanwhile, on the 41st floor, saxophonist
Patrick Lamb joins the Tom Grant Band for a set of soapy-smooth
jazz; they'll all head down to the restaurant at 9:30 pm
to take you through the rest of the night. Or you could
stay upstairs for Lily Wilde and her 13-piece Jumpin' Jubilee
Orchestra. A limited number of guests will also be treated
to helicopter rides around the city nightscape. The cover
charge includes unlimited beverages, but even if you act
like William Buckley, you'll have to drink like Hank Bukowski
to get your money's worth. (JG)
Atwater's, 111 SW 5th Ave., 275-3600. 6:30 pm. $675.
JESUS PRESLEY NEW YEAR'S EVE SINNERS BALL
Alas,
this Second Coming takes the form of a flurry of pomade-lubricated
rattling and sequin-sparkled lounging courtesy of Jesus
Presley, the enigmatic hepcat oddity that never fails to
spin every hip and head on the dance floor. The last sock
hop of the Current Era will also feature several national
DJs, a secret celebrity host from the Howard Stern Show,
door prizes that include a trip to Vegas (Sin Central, of
course), the customary spread of edibles, and plenty of
spiked punch to help you count down to the Rapture. (AD)
Cobalt Lounge, 32 NW 3rd Ave., 225-1003. 8 pm. $100.
A BALL AT THE CRYSTAL
The Crystal Ballroom plays
host to one of the millennium's biggest parties, with festivities
in full swing throughout the building, from Ringler's on
the ground floor to the new second-floor venue Lola's Room
and the crowning Ballroom itself. There, the Spirits in
Rhythm--now led by the Fabulous Miss Lee Lee, after energetic
ex-frontman Casey MacGill split for Broadway--will have
you swinging from the chandeliers. Also expect McMenamins
to dish out the usual goods: appetizers, full buffet, complimentary
champagne toast, commemorative photo, and a simulcast of
the ball drop from Times Square. (AD)
Crystal Ballroom, 1332 W Burnside St., 778-5625. 8 pm.
$210, $400 per couple. 21 and over.
NINTH ANNUAL CHAMPAGNE BALL
No better way to leap into the bright and shiny, sure-to-be-glorious
New Tomorrow of the 21st Century than with an '80s cover
band called the Retros. Uh, right. "Auld Lang Syne" might
translate as "old long ago," but the Reagan years ain't
what Robert Burns had in mind when he penned that most weepingly
nostalgic of holiday tunes--though this night's $125 price
tag certainly conjures memories of that indulgent decade.
Buffet, champagne, party favors and DJ dancing are among
the other typical offerings, plus you can bed down in the
building for a mere $275 extra. (JG)
Hilton Hotel, 921 SW 6th Ave., 224-8499. 8 pm.
$125.
ULTRA LOUNGE DISCO 2000
Monqui presents an extra-smooth
transition into the New Year, with DJs Aquaman, Mike Stevens
and Brad Vachal spinning sounds to accompany the clinking
and sipping from cocktail glasses, as well as busting grooves
for those bent on dancing from one century to the next.
Two dance floors, three bars and an all-night buffet make
this a multitiered playground for your partying pleasure.
Ticket prices range from economical (for just the dancing)
to astronomical (for room accommodations in the dowdy Red
Lion). (AD)
Red Lion Hotel-Coliseum, 1225 N Thunderbird Way, 223-5833
or 235-8311. 9 pm. $39, $69 or $199 advance. The top-dollar
ticket gets you a room equipped with a Y2K survival kit:
a bottle of Korbel champagne (the finest!), a half-pound
of peanut M&Ms, two glasses, two bottles of water, beef
jerky (amount unspecified) and a flashlight. The Gideon
Bible, of course, comes with the room anyway.
MICHAEL ALLEN HARRISON
Maybe you don't want
a bacchanalian orgy of drink and debauchery. Maybe you have
quieter tastes. Maybe you just want to take it easy. This
is the place. Even as the tumultuous thousands crush into
Pioneer Square a few blocks away, Michael Allen Harrison
will sow piano-watered peace in the Old Church and record
the results; attendees will receive an exclusive signed
copy of the resulting Millennium CD a few weeks later.
A buffet, sumptuous desserts and champagne are also included
in the price. (JG)
Old Church, 1422 SW 11th Ave., 222-2031. 9:30 pm. $250.
PORTLAND SPIRIT 2000
When Y2Kaos strikes at the stroke
of midnight, do you want to be downtown--swarmed by drunken
revelers, gleeful rioters and apocalyptic nut jobs--or would
you prefer a smooth cruise on the Willamette River, safe
from harm and with a good view of the (possibly flaming)
city? If the latter is more your speed, get the spirit--the
Portland Spirit, that is. The venerable cruise vessel
is offering a food-and-music fête featuring mini-big
band the Broadway Nine, a buffet and unlimited champagne
(you better believe it for 200 smackers!) during this three-hour
tour. Another selling point: Boats have their own power
supply, so your bubbly should be chilled to perfection.
Downtown parking will undoubtedly be a serious pain in the
ass, though. (JG)
Portland Spirit, Southwest Front Avenue and Salmon Street,
224-3900.
9:30 pm. $200. 21 and over.
PINK MARTINI
Have you heard of these guys? If so, you
haven't heard them here, in the echoey space of Union Station,
with their rhythmic Latin-dance prancing punctuated by the
clacking of travelers' shoes and the squealing of train
brakes. Good band, but an odd venue--when was the last time
you spent a hundred bucks to hang around the railroad depot?
(JG)
Union Station, 800 NW 6th Ave., 224-8499. 9 pm. $100
advance.
CELEBRATION 2000 AT PIONEER COURTHOUSE SQUARE
Portland's
living room is about to get mighty crowded. Officials expect
a horde of approximately 100,000 folks in a 15-block area
of downtown, where they'll be serenaded by neo-swingers
Royal Crown Revue and watch fireworks rupture the dark winter
skies with explosions of light. Battalions of Portland's
finest will be on hand to play chaperone. It's also non-alcoholic.
That's the bad news. The good news is, it's free--and as
we all know, free is a very good price. Bring an umbrella,
warm clothes and whatever precautions you deem appropriate
in case some millennial madmen decide to run amok. Oh, and
for Pete's sake, take public transportation there. Drunk
drivers suck, but being stuck in a traffic jam when the
apocalypse hits sucks even more. (JG)
Pioneer Courthouse Square, 701 SW 6th Ave., 223-1613.
9 pm.
Free--striking a blow for the proletariat!
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Willamette Week | originally
published November 23,
1999
|
