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Here to Stay is the New Bird
Our crack team of musicologists deciphers the meaning of Christmas as dropped down the chimney on CD.

Let's face it, traditions can be a bit ho-hum. Just because the holiday season goes hand in hand with songs passed down through the ages, it doesn't mean you have to fall prey to the "I only play the Carpenter's Christmas Collection " syndrome. (The Carpenter's Christmas Collection happens to be superb.) Explore, all ye faithful. And don't forget to invite Parson Brown.


Winter Solstice Reunion
Various Artists
(Windham Hill)


I must be getting old: I actually like this holiday album from our placid, wistful friends at Windham Hill. Shy on the ubiquitous Christian references and obnoxious Santa-Claus-and-Rudolph tripe, the mostly vocal-free disc features Windham Hill regulars (Liz Story, George Winston, et al.) doing their simple take on nature-inspired solstice tunes. Substituting this collection of gentle melodies for your family's annoying Christmas albums shouldn't be much of a struggle. Liz Brown

Christmas at Home
Donny Osmond
(Epic/Legacy)

Just when I thought I'd forgotten the Osmonds' 1970s variety show, Donny and Marie emerge with a new TV show, and Donny records this unnecessary album. The press release claimed I'd be surprised by the collection's "twists and turns," but the only turning I witnessed was that of my stomach when I heard this mix of boring carols interspersed with slick and sappy easy-listening crap. Wrap this one for your worst enemy. Liz Brown
Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas
Diana Krall

(GRP/Impulse!)


For you stingy holiday-music Scrooges, this GRP offering has only three songs. Though Krall's voice isn't particularly sassy nor her phrasing all that inventive, this is a nice, mellow, fire-crackling disc du jour. Her relaxed, slightly flat delivery is reminiscent of Shirley Horn, and her piano playing has enough spark to make "Jingle Bells" jangle. For that grab bag at the office, GRP includes the 1999 Diana Krall Desk Calendar (while supplies last!) with coy pics of our heroine. No kidding. Bill Smith

Holiday Songs and Lullabies
Shawn Colvin

(Columbia)

Many may question the commercial wisdom of this Grammy diva recording a follow-up disc of Christmas songs and children's lullabies, but I've always admired Colvin's willingness to test audiences' loyalties. Colvin--who recorded the disc last June when she was 8 1/2 months pregnant--tackles a program of traditional songs arranged by 20th-century American music great Alec Wilder. For those who enjoy her waifish soprano, this disc offers a nice byway to the well-trodden path of holiday fare. Bill Smith

Valley of Christmas
Andrei Codrescu

(Gert Town Records)

In definitely the oddest aural Christmas present of the year, occasional NPR commentator Andrei Codrescu recites this bizarre New Orleans story of youngster Almond Joy and his quest to find "the land of never getting old." If you're imagining an inspiring romance or a Christmas package wrapped in the prettiest of bows, think again. Spiked with hilarious pop paraphrasing (the enchantress Priscilla is described as looking "like Brooke Shields in Pretty Baby and a little like Nastassia Kinski in Tess of the D'Urbervilles"), this imaginative television-age morality tale ranks with the best of Codrescu's NPR pieces. Bill Smith

A Jazz Christmas
Various Artists
(Windham Hill)

If you're looking for anything of musical interest or jazz consequence, this isn't the place. A Jazz Christmas manages to sand even the occasionally rough edges of Larry Coryell down to the smoothest of smooth. For background accompaniment while chatting with the in-laws, however, this is the place. Bill Smith
12 Songs of Christmas
Etta James
(Private Music)

On the aptly titled 12 Songs of Christmas, Etta James sings holiday classics in a lightly basted bluster of jazz. As the snare drum brushes against the smooth-as-eggnog saxophone, James' cocoa voice coos warmly, like the smoldering red-hot coal of Christmas Past. Her dusky serenade takes shopping-mall and hotel-lobby seasonal standards and renders them a sultry sleigh ride with a sexy Mrs. Claus. Never has "The Little Drummer Boy" been so naughty and so nice. Pa rum pa pum pum. Alyssa Isenstein

Acid X-mas
Various Artists
(Streetbeat)


A drum'n'bass rendition of "The First Noel," anyone? Yep, it's all of your favorite Christmas tunes done in full-color techno. DJ Rob E, Noel W. Sanger and other unnotable trip-hoppers and rave-makers offer sample-based reworkings of the old standards. Forget the traditional. Why bother with a violin concerto of "Silent Night" when you can space out to the hardcore techno version by Bass Trip? Sure "O Come All Ye Faithful" by the Boston Pops sounds pretty, but Elf 7's acid-house version is totally trippy. It's 1998 and the beats are thumping--even at Christmas. Jeff Fuccillo

Celtic Christmas IV
Various Artists

(Windham Hill)

Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, solstice...this will work as the soundtrack for any and all of your winter holidays. Celtic Christmas IV presents lilting, introspective tunes from Liam O'Flynn, William Coulter, Patrick Cassidy and Ricky Skaggs. All evoke pagan and Christian sentimentality with tender melodies and soothing vocalizations of traditional and original material. Regardless of your celebratory leanings, this collection is a perfect backdrop for snuggly times spent in front of an evening fire. Jeff Fuccillo

The Gift
Jung

(Atlantic)


With orchestral accompaniment, Jung plays dramatic versions of Christmas standards on harp. The very nature of her instrument gives this otherwise standard collection of holiday songs a nearly experimental edge. The harp's many strings ring all at once to emit a flowing wash of sound that's as dazzling as it is dizzying, but well-known melodies emerge from deep within this many-noted flurry. Jung's "Carol of the Bells/Jingle Bells" melody sounds half-psychotic, half-angelic, and "A Sleigh Ride with Rudolph" is weird but majestic. A very modern, very peculiar album. Jeff Fuccillo

Ultimate Christmas
Various Artists

(Arista)


Ultimate Christmas intersperses tried-and-true renditions by such notables as Nat King Cole, Bing Crosby, Elvis Presley and Ella Fitzgerald with more recent Christmas ruminations from the likes of Sarah McLachlan, Kenny G and Whitney Houston. The result is what you'd expect: The older material is good but redundant, while the new contenders can't help paling in comparison. Be especially wary of the Carly Simon entry, which should be renamed "The Fright Before Christmas." Jay Sanders

Christmas '98
Z100 Morning Zoo

(Z100 Music)

For a refresher course in fifth-grade humor, you can't do much better than this gem. With tons of "poignant" and "hilarious" musings, the Z100 collection spotlights such 1998 highlights as "Titanic Gas," "Body Odor with Dano," "Linda Tripp Tapes" and "Calling Iraq Burger King." The morning crew capably works both sides of the coin, mining such topical goldmines as the Clinton sex scandal, the Spice Girls and Viagra, while maintaining its focus on classic fare like farts and gynecologists. You so crazy! Jay Sanders


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Willamette Week | originally published December 22, 1998

 

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