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WINNERS
1. The only time salmon
should be in hot water is when we're cooking dinner. Last
week's flurry of legal actions against the DEQ and the EPA
focused attention on the Willamette River's sauna-like temperatures--and
helped build public pressure to turn down the thermostat.
2. Two questions have long haunted the minds of
earthlings: Is there life on other planets, and, if so,
what form do their sports franchises take? Answers may be
forthcoming now that one our planet's richest alien enthusiasts,
multibillionaire Paul Allen, has given the California-based
SETI Institute $11.5 million to build a new telescope
for homing in on radio broadcasts that may signal distant
stadiums.
3. Attack of the killer mushroom: Mycologists
swelled with pride at the discovery of a 2,200-acre
fungus, billed as the world's largest single organism, in
Eastern Oregon's Malheur National Forest. Hallucinogen-heads
shouldn't get too excited, however--this 'shroom decays
wood and kills trees.
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LOSERS
1. Slapped with a $4 million sex-abuse lawsuit,
the Archdiocese of Portland may be relieved that
the dead can't talk. The lawsuit alleges that the Rev. Aldo
Orso-Manzonetta, who died in 1996, abused at least two altar
boys between 1968 and 1974 in his quarters at St. Michael
the Archangel Church.
2. Immigrants lining up to study English
may have to keep waiting. Portland Community College's directors
admitted last week that while they had found funding for
their popular ESL programs, they're short on classroom space.
Classrooms in Washington County that used to host ESL courses
are already reserved for other uses.
3. It's time for Oregon's death row inmates
to break out the desperate legal maneuvers and start saying
their prayers: The anti-execution measure has failed to
qualify for the ballot. No word if supporters will amp up
again for 2002.
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