Scoop: This Gossip is Boiled, then Baked.

1. BAGELGATE FALLOUT CONTINUES: Proving that Portlanders simply will not tolerate non-boiled bagels, Denver-based Einstein Bros. pulled the plug on three local stores last week, only a year and a half after it bought out popular Portland-based chain Kettleman Bagels, eventually changing the name of its five locations to Einstein Bros. Bagels. The former Einstein locations at Southeast 11th Avenue, Southeast Hawthorne Boulevard, and Southwest Scholls Ferry Road are now closed. The 11th Avenue location actually housed the original Kettleman store. More quietly, Einstein Bros. has also abandoned the last vestiges of Kettleman’s bagels in its shops; on April 13, the chain discontinued using Kettleman’s recipes for kettle-style boiled bagels. Meanwhile, the battle for succession continues. We did our part by asking five local rabbis to participate in a blind bagel taste-off for this issue’s food section.

1. THINGS FALL APART: Last week, two popular Portland dive bars received word they’ll be condemned or demolished. Joe’s Cellar in Northwest Portland—home to both blue-collar poetry and many a Willamette Week editor’s heartfelt karaoke—has been deemed unfit to inhabit by the City of Portland, effective April 15. Black Cat Tavern in Sellwood will also be closing, on June 30, and the building will be demolished by its owner, according to the bar’s Facebook page. The page’s owner invited one of the bar’s patrons to take a piece of its wall as a keepsake.

1. CALL IT ECLIPTIC: Legendary Oregon brewer John Harris—inventor of Deschutes’ Black Butte Porter and Mirror Pond Pale Ale, McMenamins’ Hammerhead Ale and a number of Full Sail beers—has planned an open house at his new North Portland brewery on Sunday, April 28. He plans to announce the brewery’s name then, but WW, ever the spoilsport, looked at Oregon’s business registry and discovered that Harris has filed for businesses named Harris Brewing, Ecliptic Brewing and Helio Brewing. Our money’s on Ecliptic Brewing, though this hunch is based solely on a trademark for Ecliptic that Harris filed Dec. 27. Whatever its name, the brewpub will be located at 805 N Cook Street.

1. THIS IS HAPPENING: Defunkt Theatre wants your money to stage a twin set of plays that director Jon Kretzu calls two of theater’s earliest depictions of homosexuality. The company has set a $10,000 goal for its Indiegogo campaign, which ends at midnight April 17. As of April 15, it was only at $2,285. And if that sum isn’t collected? Well, umm, the productions of Lillian Hellman’s The Children’s Hour and Mart Crowley’s The Boys in the Band will happen anyway, though Defunkt artistic director Matthew Kern said the company won’t stop trying to solicit donations. “The shows are definitely happening,” Kern tells WW. The shows open May 10.

WWeek 2015