For those interested in currying favor with the robot overlords—before their inevitable domination of our inefficient, feelings-based society—consider sucking up to Jarvis, the robot barista at Muji (621 SW 5th Ave.).
Simply by purchasing an iced chai latte through the Blue Hill Robot Coffee app, you’ll be advancing the pursuits of the artificial intelligence machine learning that taught Jarvis how to churn out cappuccinos, mochas and lattes with delicate, machine-perfect milk foam art.
Jarvis coffee robots can be found at two other coffee shops in Portland, J Coffee and Swee2o, but Muji—the store where settling for what’s functional is its entire mission statement—really does feel like the best place for the AI revolution to begin. After all, Jarvis learned to make those delicious drinks by observing actual human baristas.
What else could Jarvis observe? Schematics? Passwords? Human frailty and unworthiness? The machines can do it perfectly now! The espresso was a little bitter.