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No way this Natalie Portman bed-buddy comedy with Ashton Kutcher could be halfway good, could it? Way.
No Strings Attached
WW Critic's Score: 70
In what is basically a full-length enlargement of the "We love you, Natalie!" "I wanna fuck you, too!" exchange from Saturday Night Live, Ashton Kutcher plays Adam, the besotted penis filling Natalie Portman's Emma on a casual rotation. Directed by Ivan Reitman, No Strings Attached is a little bit granddad's fantasy of hook-up culture (Kevin Kline even gets it on the regular from somebody half his age), but it's also the first feature script for screenwriter Elizabeth Meriwether, and so contains actual women asked to do more than serve as objects of desire. In fact, it's Kutcher who's the ogled beefcake here, and the movie offers the welcome twist of smart indie girls @font-face { font-family: "Lucida Sans"; }p.MsoNormal, li.MsoNormal, div.MsoNormal { margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; font-size: 11pt; font-family: "Times New Roman"; }div.Section1 { page: Section1; } @font-face { font-family: "Cambria"; }p.MsoNormal, li.MsoNormal, div.MsoNormal { margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; font-size: 12pt; font-family: "Times New Roman"; }div.Section1 { page: Section1; } —Greta Gerwig, Olivia Thrilby, Mindy Kaling @font-face { font-family: "Lucida Sans"; }p.MsoNormal, li.MsoNormal, div.MsoNormal { margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; font-size: 11pt; font-family: "Times New Roman"; }div.Section1 { page: Section1; } @font-face { font-family: "Cambria"; }p.MsoNormal, li.MsoNormal, div.MsoNormal { margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; font-size: 12pt; font-family: "Times New Roman"; }div.Section1 { page: Section1; } —taking advantage of puppy-eyed boys. For the first time in recent memory, the luminous Portman plays a human being I would want to encounter, while Kutcher, not even close to her equal as a screen presence, at least milks his reputation as an unserious man @font-face { font-family: "Cambria"; }p.MsoNormal, li.MsoNormal, div.MsoNormal { margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; font-size: 12pt; font-family: "Times New Roman"; }div.Section1 { page: Section1; } —"the guy she fucked a couple of times in a handicapped bathroom," to be precise @font-face { font-family: "Cambria"; }p.MsoNormal, li.MsoNormal, div.MsoNormal { margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; font-size: 12pt; font-family: "Times New Roman"; }div.Section1 { page: Section1; } —for its share of pathos. (I appreciated the moment where Adam commemorated their first congress by bringing Emma a balloon reading "Congrats;" he also makes her a mix CD to celebrate her menstruation, and that joke works too.) The picture starts out listlessly bawdy, but it grows surprisingly affecting as the lead couple moves toward admitting the attachment they find too obviously sentimental to confess. My feeling about No Strings Attached is too obviously contrarian to utter, but I'll just go ahead and say it: It's better than Black Swan. R.
Opens Friday at Century 16 Cedar Hills Crossing, Century at Clackamas Town Center, Century Eastport 16, Cinema 99 Stadium 11, Cinemas Bridgeport Village Stadium 18&IMAX, Cinetopia, City Center Stadium 12, Cornelius 9 Cinemas, Division Street Stadium 13, Evergreen Parkway Stadium 13, Hilltop 9 Cinema, Living Room Theaters, Lloyd Center Stadium 10 Cinema, Movies On TV Stadium 16, Oak Grove 8 Cinemas, Sandy Cinemas, Sherwood Stadium 10, Tigard 11 Cinemas, Wilsonville Stadium 9 Cinema.
WWeek 2015