Skip to main contentWeed is an invaluable Thanksgiving side dish.
Whether you’re riding a solitary wave, cutting up with friends and fam over green bean casserole, or spending the day clocked in at time and a half, the right cultivar can take your Thanksgiving from ordinary to phenomenal.
This Thanksgiving, take your cousins, co-workers or snuggie for a “walk” with one of these appetite-stimulating, emotionally uplifting strains. Most will hit beautifully if taken about 20 minutes before dinner. Regardless of what’s on the menu, the vibes will be exceptional and the food will taste amazing.
Zurple Punch
Oregrown’s Zurple Punch cold-filtered nectar has been in my dab rotation for a while, unfailingly delivering munchies with each giggly, couchlocking high. Zurple Punch could be a great start to your festivities, but it could also be a smart recovery smoke to ease users into a halftime digestion haze, before tickling them back awake with a lust for dessert.
Expect a lemony, piney exhale that will expel all types of demons from your lungs before launching into a cashmere-fuzzy head high and melty body buzz.
Get it from: Oregrown, 111 NE 12th Ave., 503-477-6898, oregrown.com.
Super Lemon Haze
Just because the pre-dinner smoke sesh has a reputation for delivering bleary-eyed diners to the holiday table doesn’t mean you can’t blow an entire blunt and roll up to your place firing on all cylinders. In fact, strains like Super Lemon Haze deliver focus-sharpening, energy-bolstering and cognition-fortifying effects that only dissolve into juicy munchies after the effervescent high begins to dim. Even those who prefer heavy-lidded, syrupy effects can appreciate not only the dazzle of haze at the holiday table, but also the wet-mouth munchies that follow.
Expect a bright citrusy exhale and deliciously skunky-lemon perfume.
Get it from: Cannabliss & Co., 2231 W Burnside St., 971-279-5570, cannablissandco.com.
Kush Mints
Kush Mints is a go-to strain for therapeutic appetite stimulation, so it stands to reason there may be a run on this cultivar in the days leading up to the holiday. Bred from a cross of Bubba Kush and Animal Mints, this hybrid’s intoxicating effects are reportedly well pronounced—inspiring users to lean into rosy, sedative relaxation rather than sparkling chatter.
This strain was responsible for some of my most prolific munch sessions of the year, and even had me convinced that Cracker Barrel was my favorite restaurant after I hotboxed in the parking lot before an ironic brunch. I’m a definition brunch snob, so if Kush Mints can make me feel some way about Cracker Barrel, just imagine what it can do for you and Auntie’s dry-ass turkey.
Expect a minty, grassy mouthfeel that leaves a brisk peppermint (or toothpaste, depending on your mint associations) aftertaste.
Get it from: Chalice Farms, 823 SW Naito Parkway, 503-501-4612, chalicefarms.com.
Creme Brulee
This stoney cross of Platinum Kush, OG Kush and Girl Scout Cookies is pretty accurately named. Both the aroma and the exhale have the same velvety vanilla, burnt butter and sweet caramel aftertaste of a pâtisserie crème brûlée. But bakery citations aside, this hybrid balances a glittering mild euphoria and a deep, stress-quieting cerebral relaxation. The cotton-soft onset keeps the effects relatively low stakes, and the strain has a therapeutic reputation for not just appetite stimulation, but relief from anxiety, chronic pain, depression and insomnia as well.
Expect both a perfume and an inhale that smacks of day-old French pastries.
Get it from: Floyd’s Fine Cannabis, 1602 N Columbia Blvd., 503-895-9500, floydsfinecannabis.com.
Puta Breath
Another munchiemention© strain I’ve kept in rotation this season, Puta Breath is a brassy, long-lasting indica hybrid that buffs away the rougher edges of a long day while also delivering effects light enough to feel celebratory. This cultivar is a hybrid of local faves Wedding Cake and Mendo Breath. Users familiar with those parent strains can expect a recognizable high that eases them into a deep, complacent relaxation before blossoming into borderline epic snackiness. And bonus: This neon-mellow high can also be enjoyed in more wakeful settings like wandering the snack aisles at Target, zombie-walking to the coffee shop, or faking awareness at the dinner table.
Expect an earthy, piney inhale and a stiff, bitter-wood exhale. ¿Es así como huele mi aliento?
Get it from: Gram Central Station, 6430 NE Martin Luther King Jr. Blvd., 503-284-6714.
French Cookies
This rarefied phenotype of Platinum Cookies delivers effects classically linked to both indica and sativa cultivars—which is to say, it energizes like a landrace strain without saddling users with anxious jitters. It also provides a bone-deep relaxation without couchlocking its fans into oblivion. The high arrives with focused creativity and a gauzy flush of energy, but eventually dissolves into a loose tranquility that is absolutely enhanced by a robust munch. For culinary potheads looking to pregame both cooking and eating, this strain may deliver just the split-level high you’re looking for.
Expect a flowery, botanical perfume and a sweet, heady exhale that pairs perfectly with an extra helping of pumpkin pie.
Get it from: Natural Remedies, 9810 E Burnside St., 503-444-7792, pdxweedz.com.