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Famously quirky Lonesome's Pizza very quietly disappeared at the beginning of July.
The late-night delivery pizza spot inside Dante's on West Burnside Street was made famous for including edible glitter among its toppings and art in every box, not to mention its part ownership by Mini-Marilyn Manson, aka Nik Sin.
According to Dante's owner Frank Faillace, Lonesome's gave a mere week's notice before Dante's had to take back over its pizza window. They're now calling the window Pizza Slut.
"We're going back making good New York style pizza," Faillace tells WW. Faillace says there's no bad blood, but the ever-changing Lonesome's mural on the side of the bar seems to tell a different story.
First co-owner Noah Antieu's face was X-ed out on the "Lonesome's Pizza" mural, while a heart was drawn with an arrow pointing to Sin.
Now, only Sin is pictured on the wall. (Sin also emcees at Faillace's neighboring strip club, Kit Kat Club.) The Lonesome's Pizza site currently redirects to a donation page for Planned Parenthood. Antieu, on his Instagram, wrote that he's now starting a cannabis marketing company.
Meanwhile, the kind people at Portland Reddit were incensed, and peppered the Pizza Slut Facebook page with outrage that Pizza Slut posted a series of tongue-in-cheek five-star reviews of themselves on Facebook, before the restaurant had even opened.
Sample from owner Faillace: "I want to rub it all over my body but it's already inside my body. Is that weird?" Sample from the longtime Satyricon and Dante's sound guy Stevie Mickelson: "They make the best pizza in the world. It's so good that Macauley Culkin is putting his band "The Pizza Underground" back together so he can share it with everyone."
This led to perhaps the most resounding restaurant social media clapback in recent memory—at least by a bar that's not named Victory Bar.
Anyway, Lonesome's Pizza R.I.P. We missed your funeral in July—as did, somehow, all other major non-social media—the Travel Channel published a positive review and recommendation two weeks after they closed.
But we will forever miss their Fela Kuti mix CDs and their crouching tiger hidden whatever, their "Hammy's Pizza vs. a wet paper bag with a mustache," and their vingt-six by any name. In an age of Postmates, delivery pizza just got a little bit worse.